Chris Brown and Raz B: Twitter Beef Over Rihanna

So it's like 5am and as usual I am wide awake so decide to jump on Twitter to see what's been popping. To my surprise Raz B is trending so I automatically think ¬_¬ who is he calling out for molesting him now (don't look at me like that, you know you were thinking it too, these times all that dickhead does is cry rape).

So I do some lazy digging to see what the fuss is this time (coz if this HAS BEEN is trending something BIG must've gone down) only to find out that he is having TWITTER BEEF with the world's favourite woman beater CHRIS BROWN. 

You know them ones where I just thought; of all the celebrities in the world that could be talking smack to each other, it's YOU TWO ¬_¬ WHY? 

Now Twitter beef among regular folk is stupid enough, so how are you man gonna be BIG BIG celebrities (well Chris Brown anyway) and be on them laptop ninja movements O_o? 

Celebrities should never have been given Twitter because it further exposes their dickheadism and desperation to hold onto their fame. Nowadays it's a battle to stay relevant, and it seems that any form of publicity will -do including constant self-exposure about getting raped on Raz B's part. ¬_¬ It's like, shut up already; B2K broke up in 2005 which is around the same time you hotted up that Chris Stokes was a booty fiddler. What happened to you was sad but it's been FIVE FUCKING YEARS, WE'RE OVER IT. IF YOU NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT SO DAMN MUCH GET A FUCKING THERAPIST, WE, THE PUBLIC, DON'T GIVE A SHIT ANYMORE! JHEEZE!

Back to the drama. 

I decided to go onto both Chris Brown and Raz B's Twitter pages to see how it popped off, and the conclusion I came to was...attention seeking *rolls eyes*. 

Basically, Raz B (like the epic loser that he is) was PUSSY BEGGING (I would say flowering, but flowering requires GAME, which is something that he clearly lacks) on Rihanna over Twitter. 

You know them ones where even though a person refuses to feel shame for their pride-less antics, you automatically feel it for them because you can't believe the PURE DICKHEADISM they are gwanin' with...? Yeah that. 

How can this WASTEMAN be dedicating songs to Rihanna over Twitter like some any die hard FAN (man actually had the cheek to draw for Jodeci 'Cry For You' ¬_¬ these times it is NEVER that deep).

"@Rihanna I promise to hold you like a pillow and make you feel right!!!!!!" -Raz B < you know them ones where Rihanna read this and was like ¬_¬ no thanks!

Of all the men that in the world that could have Rihanna, what in the fuck makes RAZ B think he has a shot in HELL? <--(These are the questions we must ask ourselves). You aren't on the levels to recieve that cailbre of fandango with your ANY MAN HAS BEEN willy! >_< Don't rage me!

Anyway, he carries on with his foolishness then decides to take it to NEXT LEVELS and bring Chris Brown into it (this paigon had the balls to @ him while he was moving to man's ex -aint that some GRADE A BULLSHIT!): 

"Im just sittin here Thinking how can niggas like @ebenet & @ChrisBrown disrespect women as Intelligent as @HalleBerry11@Rihanna" - Raz B

O_O EXCUSE YOU! 

Now I am not saying that what he said isn't true cause Chris is FULLY wrong for what he did to Rihanna, but could you ever imagine getting the wicked talk from this ANY GUY! STOP RAGING ME! 

As low as Twitter beef is for celebrities, if I was Chris I woulda fired back too cause who is he really talking to? I don't understand O_o:

"@razb2k nigga you want attention! Grow up nigga!!! Dick in da booty ass lil boy"

"Tell me this @razb2k!! Why when the money was coming in u won't complaining about getting butplugged! #homothug!!!" < #THIS looool

"I ain't deleting my tweet either!! I was minding my damn business and Peter pan decides to pop off!!! # whatalame"  -Chris Brown 

Now before I continue, I just want to make sure that we are all CLEAR that Raz started this. Yes? Good. 

Anywho, pay attention to this next part:

"@chrisbrown I luv how u resort 2 disrespectful low brow tactics when u clearly sabotaged ur own career by beating women!" -Raz B < is he actually being serious. 

How can this guy GAS about LOW BROW TACTICS when he clearly sent for man FIRST for no damn reason other than some weak ass attempt to get at RiRi's vajayjay? Sound's kinda low brow to me. Shit don't make no fucking sense. The way I see it, if you're gonna fire shots at someone then be prepared for them to fire back, otherwise keep your mouth SHUT. 

Real talk, Raz drew for the 'woman beater' card for Chris so it was obvious that Chris was gonna draw for the homosexual one; I mean, it's Raz B. All he does is talk about who's dick was in his ass and in his mouth so what retort was he really expecting? 

So with all this talk of low brow tactics Raz then comes back with:

"yo @chrisbrown i heard about all yo BoyFriends & tell yo cheerleader @1omarion 2 shut the fuck up b4 i send J BOOG 2 fuck HIS MaMa again" -Raz B 

Am I the only one that doesn't understand why Omarion is being brought into this or why Raz used this opportunity to hot up that J Boog apparently nooged Omarion's marj? 

By this time I am fully on Chris's side (I mean, I was there from the start 'cause I don't rate Raz B, but I'm with Chris EXTRA now) cause Raz b -as per usual -just wanted attention so he could run up his mouth about the secret life of B2K that no one cares about anymore.

The wicked talk continues, then the fire starter decides that it's time to play victim to get people on his side: 

"@Chrisbrown Since you took this that far! Dude, i wasnt Raped! what a disrespect to every Kid around the world that has been Molested!!!!!" <How? These times it was just a disrespect to YOU, dickhead ¬_¬

"@chrisbrown u victimize victims, ur a homophobe, ur on the down low & a woman beater. Merry Christmas & thx 4 showin every1 ur true colors" -Raz B

I'm saying this from NOW; ANYONE who sided with RAZ B is a FULLTIME DICKHEAD AND A PART TIME PRICK (Vex In The City bars loool) cause it is evident that Raz is a fucking GEM. If I was Chris I would've  thought 'fuck this dude' and carried on enjoying being rich and famous knowing that Raz B is broke, going NOWHERE in life and will probably end up homeless and selling his booty on a corner in downtown LA for a loaf of bread. 

I was ELATED with Chris's comebacks though (I love a good insult =D) cause I. Was. LAUGHING! LOOOOL

"@razb2k it's funny how I'm nominated for 3 grAmmys off of a mixtape and ur scrambling for change!!"

"@razb2k ur a x backup singer!!!!! What do u make? Like $1.99 an hour"

"This argument lasted longer than your career @razb2k" < O_O #PAR hahaha

"@razb2k merry christmas.i just gave you 20 thousand more followers.. u shouldve did this first instead of telling the world you got raped." -Chris Brown<LOOOL it's funny cause it's true

In the end Raz B had one good comeback: 

"@chrisbrown Oh yea, your Michael Jackson tribute was cool, until you made it about yourself!!!!! What a Disgrace!!!! God bless you too!" <(Even though he's a walad I have to agree with this)

Reverts back to being the bitch that he is and playing victim:

"@chrisbrown how do u defend urself in that manner bro? I forgive u but u hve alot of pple 2 apologize to. u offended alot of abused pple" < (PAUSE: ¬_¬ YOU forgive ME! This talk puts RAGE in my chest. How can you tell man YOU forgive him when YOU started it?)

Then ends his argument with yet MORE LAME PUSSY BEGGING ¬_¬:

"@Rihanna I see why you not with that Clown. Keep going hard I wish you the best with your success." - Raz B <-- *deep breath*Let me not start

I'm gonna end on this note; FUCK A RAZ B, FUCK HIS DEAD CAREER, FUCK HIS GOSSIP MAGAZINE MOUTH, FUCK HIS BIG ASS COCO BREAD HEAD, FUCK HIS SORE BOOTY HOLE, FUCK HIS CHUNKY JIZZ MOUTH LIPS AND FUCK HIS EXISTENCE! 

*Takes a deep breath* Pardon my French. 

Anyway, =D get at me via the links at the top of my page, if you're on Blogger make sure you follow m,e and don't be afraid to leave a comment below (unless it's about my excessive and totally unnecessary use of swear words cause I won't care because swear words make things funnier =D)

Love Scotty

Twitter Rage

Hello my lucky bad ass readers. It has only been a few hours and I'm already chatting shit on another blog post that will make you smile (or actually laugh out loud if what I say is funny enough *crosses fingers*. Lol I'm playing, I don't care if you laugh. Matter of fact, I don't even care if you like it!)

Right, so as usual I was on Twitter and after many whimsical, witty and wonderful tweets, retweets, @'s and the ever dependable #FollowFriday's, I finally hit 500 followers *takes a bow*. This EPIC success (I know it's not actually epic you kill joy) inspired me to write a blog about Twitter.

I'd like to start with saying, ANYONE THAT DOESN'T HAVE A TWITTER SUCKS ASS! That's not even my opinion (well it is, but whatever), that's a fact of LIFE.

I genuinely don't understand why some people still think that Facebook is where it's at like they haven't noticed the decrease of status updates on their news feed.


WE'RE ALL ON TWITTER NOW DUMB ASS. Get with the friggin programme!

Facebook is now the new MySpace; the only thing saving it from total abortion is that we can post pictures, make groups, play retarded ass games and other things of that nature. That being said, these things don't save Facebook from being uncool <ever notice how the word uncool is actually really uncool?

One of the reasons that Twitter is better than Facebook is that because all you can do is tweet, you actually get to know people's personalities -as opposed to Facebook where you add someone and generally never talk to them.

Now I'm not going to stunt like Twitter is the best thing since sliced bread (even though it kinda is) because it also has its flaws (which I will list and make fun of accordingly).

The first thing that is wrong with Twitter is #TeamFollowBack ¬_¬. #TeamFollowBack is a monumental group of monumental LOSERS that generally don't tweet anything of interest but sit and BEG people to follow them. Their only aim is to have extremely large amounts of followers so that they can feel important, when in reality no one actually gives a fuck about who these individuals are or what they have to say.

We all like having lots of followers, but followers should be earned #TweetLaw.

Some people do sly #TeamFollowBack movements where they somehow find your profile and then @ you for a follow along with various other random names. In my eyes these people are just as bad as SPAM. I'm not following you ¬_¬ fuck off.

Another thing that is wrong with Twitter are these stupid ass Twitter cults. Basically, there is a hierarchy on Twitter (and we all know it) made up of hood celebs and bait faces (I don't need to drop names because if you are on Twitter then you already know who these people are). Now I assume that these people do not feel that being 'bait' is enough for them, so they go to unnecessary lengths to make exclusive groups that only the people they approve of can join. I know what you are thinking "What's the point of these groups?" (that probably wasn't what you were thinking, but whatever) ¬_¬ the answer is THERE IS NO POINT! They make these 'special groups' just to say that are in them so that people will think that they are important, when in reality it just makes us think that they are dickheads because we all know why they do these silly things.

To be perfectly honest, the best people to follow are those that aren't part of those groups because they are most likely not to be on a constant image ting (I will say that SOME of them are good tweeters though. Not ALL of them, just some).

Image tings are BIG on Twitter. The amount of stunting and BUM SUCKING that goes on is enough to make you want to punch your laptop in the hard drive. Because people can say what they want on Twitter with virtually no repercussions, some people create completely different personalities to how they are in real life. I hate this because -if you haven't picked up on it by now -I'm all about realness. FUCK a FAKE!  Twitter gives total nobodies the opportunity to become somebodies and most of the time these people get gassed on their likkle piece of Twitter fame (and it is only Twitter fame because outside of Twitter, nobody cares about them) and abuse it and start talking RECK.

Another image ting on Twitter is that people will mention 'somebodies' *rolls eyes* in their tweets for no apparent reason, just to show that they can. These people should low it. 'Bait' by association doesn't make you look cool, it makes the person you are bum sucking seem more important.

Now, as I don't posess a Blackberry, I don't have the luxury of Uber Twitter. The reason I believe that Uber Twitter is a luxury is because apparently you can mute the people you follow if you think they chat too much shit. Muting is basically the same as 'hiding' someone on your Facebook news feed. OOOOH there are some people that I would RELISH muting. The simple solution would be to unfollow them, but if you are following a friend (out of obligation of course) you can't really unfollow them cause you'll look like an asshole.

Sometimes the shit chatting from some people is so intense that you will risk looking like an asshole for the sake of your blood pressure.

Another thing I can't stand about Twitter is when people constantly tweet at celebrities like they are going to get a reply. STOP BEGGING FOR LOVE, YOU LOOK LIKE A STALKER. I don't know why people think that the rules of what makes you a stalker changes just because the person is famous. They are still people, hence you still look creepy when you say shit like "@NICKIMINAJ I would drink your bath water and be your slave for a day" <-- I didn't make that up, someone actually tweeted that. I guess PRIDE is not for everyone *shrug*.

I also despise people that follow me or ask for a follow back and never @ me. This aint Facebook; them antics don't run.

Lastly, before I get ghost I would like to say this: NOT EVERY CONVERSATIONRQUIRES A RETWEET BEFOR YOU REPLY TO IT. STOP BEING HAPPY THAT SOMEONE @'ED YOU. It's so fucking annoying when people tweet basic shit to someone and that person feels the need to include the previous tweet in their reply like there was ANY element of interest in it: RT @TweetleDee: @TweetleDum Hi babe how are you < I'm fine. ¬_¬ PERFECT EXAMPLE OF WHEN THERE IS NO NEED FOR THE RETWEET.

Aside from the annoying bits, Twitter is FAN-FRIGGING-TASTIC!

D'you know what else is Fan-frigging-tastic? MY TWITTER. If you like reading my blogs, can you imagine how entertaining my tweets must be? Unfathomably entertaining that's what; so you'd better follow me *gives the evil eye*

P.S. only ask for a followback if you're funny. I don't follow back basic tweeters "Chillin' at home" ¬_¬ SO WHAT?

But yeah, that's about all I have to say on that matter. Click the links at the top of the page to get at me.

Love Scotty

Some People Should Just GIVE UP!

Hey, hey, hey! What's good people. Just jumped on here for a random rant (plus I'm allowed to swear again so I naturally couldn't wait to post something) =D.

Anywho, I was casually filtering though all of the irrelevant rubbish in the Swear Down TV Facebook inbox earlier on and I came across a message from that Tribal Man Magz guy about the remix of Tribal Skank just being released. If you guys are on my bad ass wave then automatically the same thing that popped into my head should pop into yours: SO THE FUCK WHAT!

Seriously, as soon as I saw it I was like "Dude, who fucking cares about a remix to your DEAD OUT song? NO ONE, that's who!"

I truly don't understand how the minds of these funky artists work sometimes. The Tribal Skank song came out around March 2009 (I would just like to take this time to point out that we are 3 days away from January 2011). That song has been rinsed beyond the point of resurrection, so why would he think it was a good idea to now release the remix?

The thing that annoys me about these funky artists is that they are like one trick ponies. They luck out on a hit and ride out their fame off of that track for AGES. Even when we've all moved the hell on, they are still dragging out the fame residue from that same ONE track.


Magz isn't the only one to do this; Gracious K and Funky Dee are also culprits of not accepting that their time has long since passed.

What baffles me is that event planners still book these guys to perform these dead tracks like it's some bonus that they are going to be there ¬_¬ errrrrrr NAH!

They have made (weak) attempts of making other songs, but have eventually figured out that we don't actually like them as astists, we just like that one track coz the beat was sick/it had a good dance routine/the lyrics were catchy, so they end up going back to square one.

A PERFECT example of an artist going back to square one is Lethal B. After POW he did some other tracks which were...ok for some people to listen to (I was not one of those people) and then he just FELL OFF the map. He has recently made a return with a remix of his hit POW with other *cough* better *cough* MCs on it and it seems to be taking off...AGAIN (but lets be honest, we all love the new version because of 'BUDUDUDUDADADADA'). Lethal B has done himself no favours, because like Tribal Man, that remix should have been done AGES ago and the only reason he decided to revive the flippin song is because his career was deader than the song itself (and to be honest it still is, 'cause what is Lethal really gonna pull out of his hat next if these are the lows he had to sink to, to be relevant again? These are the questions we must as ourselves).

It goes without saying that people like MC Darke aka Ayo (aka WASTEMAN) from The Family, and Shardinay should just STOP while they are behind. NO ONE RESPECTS YOU AND THE PEOPLE THAT FRONT LIKE THEY DO ARE EITHER YOUR FAMILY/FRIENDS OR SOME LEECHES THAT WANT BRING INS ON YOUR FAME! It had to be said.

Did you know that Shardinay is bringing out another version to Oh Boy ¬_¬  AND on top of that, she had the CHEEK and AUDACTIY to release a Shardinay calender like ANYONE would actually see it and think "YEAH, Shardinay is SICK. I'm gonna buy her calander and put it on my wall so I can see her face EVERYDAY for a whole year! Hooo Boyyyyy." O_O NO!

As with Shardinay, the people that run Sunday Show zeroed in on all the attention that Ayo (I want to say MC Darke but you know when I can't fully take his name seriously) was getting and let him headline their Boxing Day show because they knew that people would turn up to laugh at him (yes that is why they came, no one can tell me any different cause we all KNOW he's SHIT. 'I'm young and I'm black, surrounded by crack!' ¬_¬ Fuck off.)

The next thing I hate about these two is that people will chat shit about 'He/She is shit yeah, but you have to respect his/her hustle. No one likes her, but he/she is making money', like just because they get paid to embaress themselves that makes it okay. There are BARE good singers/MCs out there that don't get the recognition they deserve but these EPIC FAILURES do. Why is this life?

Still on the subject of Sunday Show's Boxing Day show, BlackStreet were also performing. It is CRYSTAL CLEAR that your career is over when the only performances that you do are Valentines shows (Joe/Jodeci/112 etc) or (in Blackstreet's case) the only reason that an audience is present wher you're performing is to see 'MC Darke' and you just happened to be there.

Aight last one; you know your career is OVER when you are willing to eat a DICK on NATIONAL TV -yes Aggro, I am talking to you. NO ONE respects THAT hustle no matter how much ITV paid you. You can be happy with that money all you want; eventually it will be gone but the SHAME of being a DICK EATER will still be there.

Anyway I'm bored of ranting so that is basically the end. I could have gone in on more people but it's almost 2am and thinking has become EFFORT.

Click my links at the top of the page cause I can't be asked to type them in. If there is anything you would like me to talk about, just let me know.

Love Scotty

Merry Friggin' Christmas

Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas my bad ass readers!

As it's Christmas Eve's Eve (stupid I know, but it's trending on Twitter so that makes it okay) I decided to write a blog about what the hell I think about Christmas AND as an added bonus I vow that I will not swear in this post. Instead I will use obvious words that let you know that there would be a swear word in their place. You're welcome =D

Christmas is supposed to be about celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ, but as religion is down and consumerism is up, Christmas is about PRESENTS, food, drink, loved ones and a fat white man that breaks into your house and doesn't rob you (good times).

Christmas gets people gassed. Suddenly random people decide to greet you on the street, everyone is frigging smiling at each other, and homeless people walk around in dirty Santa hats with their disease ridden dogs on the train and actually get money from more than one passenger. It's like magic. I think that it's a bit sad that it takes stupid holidays for people to be nice to each other, but any other day everybody's got an attitude.

As we get older Christmas evidently becomes LESS fun because some Grinch reveals that Santa Clause isn't real, and for some reason people think that because we're older it's okay NOT to buy us presents (a fact that I am still struggling with). 

I have a 7 year old brother (Lumpy) and every year this mini jerk face makes me jealous because over 3/4 of the friggin presents under the tree are for him. On Christmas morning he is happier than Cheapo (my mum) in a sale 'cause he gets to run downstairs at stupid times in the morning and sit under the tree for an hour to end up surrounded by heaps of tacky wrapping paper and showing off his new things while Lasho (my other brother) and I look on in envy remembering when that was us. Ahh memories.

So now that we're all big and hard back, the only good thing about Christmas is bucking up with those close to you, drinking enough to really put the merry in 'Merry Christmas', TV (or in my case exclusive knock off DVDs courtesy of my uncle) and Christmas dinner. 

Am I the only person that watches those Sainsbury's/Morrison's/M&S/Iceland adverts with their versions of Christmas dinner and think 'Bruv, that is NOT Christmas dinner'. Those ads make me want to find a random white person on the street that has those things for Christmas dinner and bring them around my lot, point to the food and be like, "That is what the frig Christmas dinner is supposed to look like. Now go back to your family and with every bite of your dry ass (ass is not a swear word it's a blasphemy :p) meal I want you to remember all of this and be JEALOUS! Jealous I say." 

Christmas dinner at a black house is basically all of our best dishes served up at the same time. It's like going to a Christening/Wedding but without having to dress up and go to a decorated community centre =). I was going to list the food...but then I thought that that would make me sound craven so just use your imagination. Can I just say this though...the left-overs are PEAK alie lol.

Now, I was having a little chit chat with Grumpo (my dad) earlier on and he made a good point about presents. It was something along the lines of people like gifts that they actually want for Christmas or they just end up with things that they don't use (he's pretty darn logical when it comes to...life, my Grumpo). 

Even though I end up with less presents, I'm not that fussed because I end up with stuff that I actually want (as opposed to some of you that get bogus stuff like socks or underwear). 

Don't you hate when people give you the most random sh- WAIT I'm not supposed to swear =( darn it - when people give you the most random things. One thing that I can't STAND getting is those make up kits that are clearly designed for white girls (what the hell am I supposed to do with pink blusher/blue eye shadow/peach coloured foundation ¬_¬ don't make me chop you in the mouth on Christmas Day please) or bath/cheap perfume sets (them BAIT gifts). 

Bath/perfume sets are annoying because you CLEARLY didn't put any thought into my gift. You went to Boots, hollered at them 3 for 2 offers, gave me one of those gifts and basically said 'Merry Christmas, you're not worth a second thought and you smell!' 

I remember one year someone got me a perfume set with FAKE TAN in it ¬_¬ I repeat -FAKE TAN! Why on GOD'S GREEN EARTH would you buy a BLACK girl FAKE TAN? I didn't even pretend to be grateful. I looked at them and said O_O "You bought me fake tan?" 

The thing that gets on my nerves even more than that is when I get someone something good and they have the cheek to get me one of those afterthought presents. I feel to take their gift back and give them a Primark gift card.

Now I realise that I sound spoilt, but as usual *shrug* I'm not bothered. This is how the frig I feel and if you don't like it (insert appropriate insult here since I'm not allowed to).

Now I know that this next one is not just me; Christmas cards! Every time I get one from someone that didn’t present me with a gift I shake it out first, and if nothing falls out then I check the envelope before checking the card AGAIN. If after that thorough inspection I see that there is no money, I feel a part of my Christmas spirit die. I don't like empty cards - there I said it. I think that they are a waste of trees because I'm not even happy that you gave me one. It's not even like you wrote a witty comment in there for me to crack a smile at; it just says 'To Scotty (the printed card greeting in the middle) From ____".  ¬_¬ Those are the kind of people that get hugs from me for Christmas.

Any who, I hope that each and every one of you has a smashing Christmas and a Happy New Year. Drink, eat, drink, laugh, drink and love (and drink a little more) to the fullest. It's the one day of the year when you can be drunk and blame it on being 'Festive' (I'm festive most of the time =D ) so take advantage of it. 

I hope you get the gifts that you want and no empty cards.
 

Hold tight those of you that will get up and go to church. That right there is some WILL POWER, cause my backside will be in my bed dreaming of unholy things...like murder, drugs and sex (mostly sex) =)

1. Tell a friend about my bad ass blog 

2. Follow me

http://www.twitter.com/ScottyUnfamous

3. Ask me ANYTHING (at your own risk O_O) 

http://www.formspring.me/ScottyUnfamous

4. Watch my show

http://www.youtube.com/SwearDownTV

5. Read my totally awesome story 'The Unfamous' 

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=187168898270&v=info

Love Scotty

F*CK a New Years Rave!

Whaddup ya'll! What it look like, what it do?  (you're diggin my frass American intro init coz it makes me sound all cool and shit, right?)


RIGHT, New Years Eve is coming up and promoters are just flooding your friggin event invite list and inboxes on Facebook because they want you to come and celebrate New Years at their raves. 


I for one, am not as hot on raving as I used to be, because most of the time raves are basically the same anyway. It's the same bait venues, with the same bait DJs and pretty much the same people that you endure at other raves. That being said, as soon as New Years rolls around promoters think that it's okay for them to bump the prices up as if their rave is going to be anything fucking special. They aint giving you no fireworks, free champagne or even a friggin balloon. The only things they ever hand out are fuckin GLOW STICKS that are fucking useless after that night, and a piece of shit whistle (or a horn if you're lucky ¬_¬). Whoops, I forgot, you may also get the free CD that you don't actually want.


Can someone please explain to me how the FUCK 'Early Bird' tickets can be £20. Is my name dickhead? 


£20 is the price that you pay if you're a dude and you reach a rave after 11pm . How can they have the CHEEK to be asking for them kinda of p's as a starting price like it's some special offer for the same old shit! These times I can stay home, get drunk and dance in my room FOR FREE! 


The next piss take is that after the 'Early bird' tickets are gone the prices sky rocket like they don't know that we're in a flippin RECESSION. Times are hard, credit crunch and all, so how can you ask man to give up £50+ for your BASIC ass rave like its acceptable. I should scissor kick you in the FACE! 


The next thing is, when you think 'Nah fuck it, I'm not paying that much to do the same shit I do in a regular rave, so I'm gonna look else where' -else where being the more up market clubs - and you see the prices that these asswipes are asking for, you just have to think; is this life? These fancy pants places are asking for £70+. 


It's like you can't catch a fucking break out here. Regular raves are taking the piss because they don't deserve to get that much money from you, and upmarket raves are asking for a deposit on a flippin house (I know I'm over exaggerating, but I don't care).


Now I know I sound like a tight ass...because I am (and what), but what you lot need to consider is how much this ONE night of mediocre fun is costing you. 


Let me break it down for you. Tickets for these raves are £20-50 (if you're lucky), then obviously cause it's some fancy pants New Years rave you need to make sure you look spice, so you get your hair/nails/feet/eyebrows/eyelashes done (tick all that apply) and you have to buy a new outfit with accessories and shoes to match. THAT was just entrance to the club and your outfit sorted (work out an estimate and tell me if already you have mentally spent too much time, effort and money for this one degga degga rave). 


NEXT there's the whole transport thing. If you have a car that's petrol money, if you're taking a taxi that's cab fare, and if you're taking public transport not only will you have to top up your oyster/buy a travel card, but you also have to stand outside dressed in next to nothing in the fucking cold waiting for the damn bus/train to come, with bare other party go-ers milling around you like friggin VERMIN. 


Already I can feel the rage building in my chest and I aint even experiencing this shit, this is just me writing about it. I don't need this kind of pressure in my life. NOW, you're finally at the rave and you're in some LONG ass queue shivering your vagina/balls off in the cold (have you seen that snow outside ¬_¬ let me not start), and every couple of minutes a bunch of pricks see their friends and push in front of you like you aint been there for an hour already cause the fucking bouncers are on some LONG TING. 


You lot are feeling the imaginary rage in your chest now init? I can sense it through the keyboard. 


FINALLY after half a lifetime of waiting you get inside, put your shit in the cloakroom (watch them bump it up for that aswell ¬_¬ '£3 O_O !Bitch kiss my ass, I'll hold my damn coat') then you go to the bathroom (you know how we females can't go to the dance floor till we are POSITIVE we are looking RIGHT) and the place is nasty! There's weave and wet tissue all over the damn sink, toilet paper is running LOW, the seats have piss on them cause of some nasty bitch, the whole place smells of vagina and economy air freshener, and there's some African lady in the corner staring you out so you will buy a 10p lollipop for a £1. You'd think that with all the extra money they are charging you they could keep the fucking toilets at an acceptable level but NO ¬_¬. 


So you hit the dance floor and you dance to the same old songs and as usual you get hassled by a few unsavoury looking dudes that can't take the hint, then you decide that you want to go to the bar for a drink only to find out that the prices are higher. Why? Because it NEW YEARS, that's why! 


RAGE!


As usual I hadn't meant to go on for so long, but the rage took control of me. I apologise (half-heartedly of course =D).


The moral of this post is NEW YEARS RAVES WERE CREATED BY SATAN TO SUCK YOUR POCKETS DRY. REBUKE AND FIND A HOUSE PARTY TO GO TO INSTEAD! HAZAAR!


Honestly a house party is the best option. It's FREE, you can get drunk AND high (or neither, it's your choice. Personally I prefer the latter) AND there's food O_O what more can you ask for?


*Chants whilst thrusting fist in the air like a pagan* HOUSE PARTIES ROCK, RAVES SUCK COCK! 


*Realises what I'm doing and looks away ashamed* I apologise again :/. Honestly, it sounded better in my head.


Anywho, you know what to do: 

1. Tell a friend about my bad ass blog 

2. Follow me

http://www.twitter.com/ScottyUnfamous

3. Ask me ANYTHING (at your own risk O_O) 

http://www.formspring.me/ScottyUnfamous

4. And watch my damn show

http://www.youtube.com/SwearDownTV

Love Scotty

x